Its not you, its me.....

Now there were a few guys that I couldn't get to stop calling and blowing my phone up! I have been asked to Miami, Napa Valley, Antigua all within 2 weeks. These guys are asking me to run away with them after meeting once! Is it me or is this weird?

At first I took the forwardness as a wooing mechanism and felt a bit flatter that I was on such high demand…. However, was I not reading into a very important piece? The fact that there is no respect for taking things slow with me. No respect for me as a person, woman, or sexual being? Instead the compliments slowly and surely began to feel like harassment....

I dated one guy... we will call him Mr. Baby. Mr. Baby and I went on 3 dates and he preceded to tell me he "loved me". Excuse me? You do not even know me? How do you love me? Mr. Baby told me what he knew about me, he loved and when "you know, you know". He went on to be very straightforward and tell me we would be getting married in 6 months and having babies soon after. Men--- as much as women like to know you want to provide for them, give them a family, etc..... this is NOT the way to go about it. You will scare the woman off. Just like guys hate the desperation that comes out of a woman's voice.... women hate to think the guy would get married to anything that moved. Needless to say, his aggression and continued forwardness in planning "our" future came to a screeching halt. I know things move a lot faster when we grow "up", but come on.... in 2 weeks you think you want to marry me?!?!

How to let the guy down easy? "It's not you, it's me". Women, if you have dished this out or heard it from a man it is complete BS. It's always something else that they are not willing to tell you. When a guy tells you this, realize it is definitely not the "I am confused and trying to figure out my life right now. I need time for me." I will decode that for you, "You are cool but not anyone I want to spend every waking moment with. If I do not find anyone else, I will keep you on the back burner and call you again."

Be straightforward with the guy.... I think you need to tell him exactly how you feel. "Your lack of communication skills is driving me mad" or "The more I am around you, the less attractive you are" or "You bore me to tears" or "Your constant texting and not calling is killing me". Something of those sorts. NOW.... ladies, you have to put your big girl panties on and be able to take the heat as well. I would MUCH rather know what is going on with the guy and why he quit calling, then the uncertainty of him "disappearing". Realize that most guys will not have the courage to tell you straight up and that is why we must set the stage. Wouldn't you rather know what really happened, than have him fall off the face of the earth and never, ever call you again? Bottom line is be honest. Do not keep going on dates with him trying to force a connection.... And realize when he is blowing you off.....